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Paper Trail: The Religious Defense

In an excerpt from her new book, Bulletproof Faith: A Spiritual Survival Guide for Gay and Lesbian Christians, author Candace Chellew-Hodge incorporates the wisdom of Xena: Warrior Princess to illustrate her theories as to how gay and lesbian people of faith can protect themselves from those who attack their views. 


The hate mail began to arrive in my e-mail box soon after I founded the first online magazine for gay and lesbian Christians, Whosoever.org, back in 1996. Those writing the e-mails had one message in common: God condemns homosexuals, and to be loved and accepted by God you must repent of your "sin" of homosexuality. It's been remarked that it's difficult to convey emotion in the body of an e-mail (which is why we have a whole lexicon of smileys and other emoticons), but the anger, hatred, and outright vitriol of those who sent me the e-mail was clear -- no emoticons were needed.

The deluge of condemning mail put me in a quandary. I was certain, even back then, that God loved me and accepted me as both a lesbian and a Christian -- but I had no idea how to defend my belief and no idea how to answer these e-mails. All I could do at that time was to respond with my own e-mails full of anger and defensiveness.

I decided that to answer these questions, I had to go back to school -- seminary, to be exact. I entered the Candler School of Theology at Emory University in Atlanta in 1998, ready to learn how to fight those who would condemn me. In the end, I realized that while those who may have written hateful letters to me were spoiling for a fight, the best response I could give them was what 1 Peter 3:15-16 calls a "gentle and reverent" response. That verse counsels Christians to always be gentle and reverent when defending the hope that is within them -- even if the attack against them is anything but.

That realization led me to put together a workshop called "Spiritual Self-Defense for Gay and Lesbian Christians" that was well received at many LGBT-focused conferences around the country. My first book, Bulletproof Faith: A Spiritual Survival Guide for Gay and Lesbian Christians, is the culmination of all those years of helping LGBT people thrive spiritually even in the face of persecution and condemnation by other Christians. It provides a blueprint for anyone, gay or straight, who may find themselves in a minority position where they feel attacked or oppressed. I draw from many divergent sources, from the Bible to Xena: Warrior Princess, to equip LGBT Christians (as well as their allies) not just to face attacks, but to turn those attacks into opportunities for personal growth and dialogue with those we may consider our "enemies."

 

Chapter 4: Wisdom Before Weapons

"It's wisdom before weapons, Gabrielle. The moment you pick up a weapon, you become a target." --Xena, on TV’s Xena: Warrior Princess, in the episode "Dreamworker"

When I first started receiving hate mail, it affected me physically. Who were these people to tell me that God hated me and would spit me out? Who were these people to judge my faith? Who were these people who thought I’d never heard of Leviticus or Romans or 1 Corinthians? Did they believe I'd read their e-mail and think, "Wow, I must have missed those passages. I'll take Whosoever down immediately!" The arrogance and sheer insolence of these people amazed me and put me into a tailspin.

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Reader Comments
  • Name: Jason
    Date posted: 1/2/2009 5:07:00 PM
    Hometown: Phoenix

    Comment:

    For example, my immediate family and my extended family were devout Roman Catholics and I wound up becoming a gay man. We do not associate with one another.

  • Name: Jason
    Date posted: 12/31/2008 4:45:00 PM
    Hometown: Phoenix

    Comment:

    I understand where you are coming from as well as the crux of your argument which asks the question "do you wish to be right or to be happy." My thing is why associate with individuals who have different beliefs than you do? Why should an oppressed group have relations with the ones who persecute you? To persuade them to your way of thinking? Sounds like a recipe for anunhappy life to me. I understand that conflicting ideologies lead to arguments and ad hominem statements against the other; but, if these two individuals with opposing beliefs did not associate with one another there would not be any conflict. Right? Would life be much easier and have less conflict if people associate with like minded ones. Myself, I choose not to associate with certain groups or individuals because I know that our beliefs are very different and plus I would feel uncomfortable in those situations. So, I do not associate with those folks.

  • Name: Granny
    Date posted: 12/29/2008 5:31:00 PM
    Hometown: Menifee, CA

    Comment:

    Bless you Cadice. I intend to buy your book and read it and pass it on to others. Thank you for your understanding and kindness. Don't be afraid of the hate mail, it is the haters who need the help.

  • Name: Sam BeGoode
    Date posted: 12/29/2008 2:39:00 PM
    Hometown: San Diego, CA

    Comment:

    The moment you picked up that book of lies and contradictions and hate and violence called "The Bible" - you became a target. Like a Jew trying to become a Nazi, why any sane gay would want to label himself a Christian is beyond me. In fact, no SANE person of ANY orientation can call themeselves religious - because to be religious means to be INSANE.

  • Name: Jessie
    Date posted: 12/29/2008 11:01:00 AM
    Hometown: Port of Spain, Trinidad

    Comment:

    Greetings and congratulations to Candice from this out and proud lesbian. I may not be Christian but I believe in peace and personal spiritual fulfillment first before trying to change the world. We in fact can only change ourselves through self-acceptance and self-mastery and the changes to society will become manifest. So many of us demand respect but give none. So many of us denounce negative stereotypes others have of us yet live those negative stereotypes every day.



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