My Two Dads

A gay couple open their doors -- and their hearts -- to an anti-gay adoption activist on FX’s 30 Days.

By Dan Avery

We’re always skeptical about reality shows that promise to change perceptions, but unlike The Real World,Trading Spouses,Amish in the City, et al, FX’s 30 Days tends to take the high road. Produced and narrated by Super Size Me director Morgan Spurlock, the series has brought an unemployed programmer to his outsourced job in Bangalore, a pro-choice woman to an anti-abortion clinic, and a straight Christian into the heart of the Castro. Partners Dennis and Thomas Patrick must have had a good feeling about the show too: For the June 24 episode, “Same Sex Parenting,” they invited Kati, a 40-something straight mom who thinks gays and lesbians shouldn’t be allowed to have kids, to come live with them and their four adopted sons -- for an entire month. Were eyes opened and fences mended -- or did the two sides drift even further apart? To find out, The Advocate contacted Dennis and Thomas, who spoke to us from their Ypsilanti, Mich., home.

THIRY DAYS 2 DADS X 395 (FX PUBLICITY) | ADVOCATE.COM

What possessed you to get involved with the show?
Dennis: Well, they came to us -- they must have found an interview I did online. We didn’t have a burning desire to be on reality TV, but I thought it was a real opportunity to make a difference. I said if someone stayed with us for just one day, they would see how loving our family is. And we thought we could get more gays to think about adopting or fostering children. There are 500,000 kids in foster care and 110,000 waiting to be adopted.

Thomas: I was more reluctant. It seemed like one more intrusion in our lives. It was the end of summer and school was starting up. [Laughs] But Dennis kind of blackmailed me into it.

Dennis: I told Tom if we didn’t do it, I was gonna be really depressed and no fun to be around.

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Reader Comments

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Name: prisca ekkens
Date posted: 6/30/2008 4:22:00 AM
Hometown: nyc

Comment:
i just watched the encore episode of 30 days featuring Dennis and Thomas Patrick, and their four adopted children. i'm not writing to focus on Kati's bigoted attitude against gay adoption, although it's hard, because i feel much anger towards her. i pledge instead to support the gay community, and any legislation that recognizes and protects the rights all United States citizens, gay or not. i just had to put it out there. -- prisca ekkens
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Name: Rick
Date posted: 6/24/2008 10:49:00 PM
Hometown: Charlotte, NC

Comment:
Using Christianity in arguments like this is pointless. What Jesus supposedly said wasn't even written down until more than 30 years after he died. And that was changed over and over again until the New Testament was finally created hundreds of years later. So who really knows what Jesus actually said? Nobody does.
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Name: Philip Rogan
Date posted: 6/9/2008 8:15:00 AM
Hometown: Dublin

Comment:
Well I think it's really simple. Love or hate. These men love their kids and each other and the lady that was brave enough to come and stay with them was finally not brave enough to let go of her prejudices that were taught to her by those that use religon as a reason to hate. Gay men and women are no better or no worse than anybody else and we simply need to see it like that - forget God in this equation, love your neighbour but you don't have to if he's an Ass...
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Name: Sorcha
Date posted: 6/7/2008 5:40:00 PM
Hometown: Portland

Comment:
Okay, since some people can't grasp that not everyone is Christian in the first place, how about this: Jesus Christ never once mentioned homosexuality. Either you believe that he made the New Covenant with us by his sacrifice, in which case the Old Testament laws laid out in Deuteronomy are null and void, or you don't, in which case you should keep those laws yourself before you condemn other people for not doing so. If that's the case. you better give up cheeseburgers, shrimp cocktail, and clothing made from more than one type of fiber. As Christians, we're meant to live Christ's example, not spend our time hating and judging other people. Jesus called. He wants his religion back.
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Name: TransmanandWife
Date posted: 6/6/2008 9:19:00 AM
Hometown: South East Texas

Comment:
Dear Daniel Please shut the heck up. Don't take the name of Jesus Christ and use it to bash people that he loves too. Jesus loves EVERYONE not just you and your narrow minded judgmental clones. Family is about love and commitment and these two men have portrayed that on many levels. My wife and I have also adopted several children and have been foster parents to many, many others. Children need family and good families come in many different packages. Since you are so upset Daniel maybe you should pray for understanding instead of spouting your hateful garbage. God is love.

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