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The Evolution of Prayers for Bobby

From big screen to Lifetime, Susan Sarandon to Sigourney Weaver, it's taken 12 years to bring Prayers for Bobby, the story of homophobe-turned-activist Mary Griffith, to life.


Bobby Griffith, portrayed by Ryan Kelley (Mean Creek), shares an intimate moment with his first boyfriend David (Scott Bailey)

The success of Brokeback Mountain notwithstanding, convincing Hollywood suits to make a gay-themed film for a mainstream audience is tough. If your script also happens to involve suicide and an indictment of evangelical faith, you’re pretty much screwed.

A rare exception is Prayers for Bobby, based on Leroy Aarons's 1995 nonfiction account of a mother named Mary Griffith, whose erstwhile religious extremism led her gay son to kill himself. Starring Sigourney Weaver, the film will finally make it to the screen this January 24, thanks to Lifetime Television (in its new, post–evil-twin-drama incarnation) and the three gay executive producers who stuck with the film through 12 years of development agony.

David Permut, 52 (whose eclectic career encompasses movies as varied as the Travolta action flick Face-Off and the upcoming Michael Cera indie Youth in Revolt), and his production partners Daniel Sladek, 43, and Chris Taaffe, 42, describe themselves as “three men on a mission.” Their story is one of unexpected network turnover, bad luck, creative clashes, a succession of female leads including Susan Sarandon and Christine Lahti, and, ultimately, the powers of persuasion.

With additional support from Stanley M. Brooks (producer of the Emmy Award–winning miniseries Broken Trail), their efforts have yielded a strategically “palatable” movie that is nevertheless bound to provoke debate among the book’s many gay fans as well as the broader Lifetime audience.

Advocate.com recently spoke with David, Dan, and Chris about their passion project and their hopes that it will help other parents accept their gay children.

Advocate.com:Was there a point at which you were ready to give up?
David: Not really. I believe in fate… Even though it took 12 years to get this movie made, I think it was meant to be. And of course, we got very lucky with Sigourney Weaver. To have a star of her caliber working with the confines of a 20-day shoot for a cable network is remarkable.

What was the project’s genesis?
Dan: Back in 1996, before David came on board, Chris walked into A Different Light bookstore [in Los Angeles] and found a copy of Prayers for Bobby. When I came home that night, he said “Don’t talk to me until I finish this book.” And then he basically went insane and insisted we try to get the film rights.

Was that easier said than done?
Chris: Yes. The book had already been optioned. But we finally flew up to Northern California to meet the author, Leroy Aarons, a year later. When we walked into his backyard, Mary Griffith and her entire family were waiting for us too, which was a shock. For probably eight hours, we all had this cathartic, storytelling, get-to-know-you discussion. They wanted to know our motivations in telling Bobby’s story.

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Reader Comments
  • Name: Russ M
    Date posted: 2/11/2009 1:44:00 PM
    Hometown: Minneapolis,MN

    Comment:

    I am a 38 year old openly gay man. I saw the previews and couldn't wait to see this movie. I was so moved that I emailed absolutely everyone I know with the link to lifetime and urged them to watch it as a personal favor to me. I thankfully, was fortunate to have an understanding and accepting family that my struggles were not as great. Some friends were not so lucky. My partner comes from a very religious family and they too shared similar struggles as Bobby and his family did. He and I volunteer and support a local GLBT library in St Paul, MN called Quatrefoil Library. This movie was so well done that I am purchasing copies on DVD to donate to the library. THANK YOU to everyone involved in bringing Mary & Bobby's story to us. To Mary Griffith- THANK YOU for sharing your heart breaking story and life lesson with all of us.

  • Name: Eric
    Date posted: 1/30/2009 5:45:00 PM
    Hometown: Honolulu

    Comment:

    Prayers for Bobby is now available in the iTunes Store for 3.99...well worth the price for this priceless movie!

  • Name: Bobby McKendrick
    Date posted: 1/28/2009 1:25:00 PM
    Hometown: San Francisco

    Comment:

    If you missed "Prayers for Bobby," its now available on youtube.com, broken into 10 parts and commercial free. It's been already viewed 2500 times! Check it out if you want to watch it; had me bawling like a baby!

  • Name: Nadia
    Date posted: 1/28/2009 2:52:00 AM
    Hometown: los angeles Ca

    Comment:

    I missed it! Im so mad! I want to see it! anyone know where I can see it or if they are showing it again? Where can I buy it??

  • Name: Kristian Harper
    Date posted: 1/28/2009 2:26:00 AM
    Hometown: Orange Park, Florida

    Comment:

    Hello, my name is Kristian. This movie seems like it was written about me. I didn't commit suicide, but I have been living with a family like that for the past 18 years. The sad thing about it is, my family is still like the religious rights believing that I'm going to hell for being a gay man. All, I have ever wanted is a family who, accepts me for who I am. I am still going through the guilt of not being able to talk to my mom. She told me the last time we talked that she "loves me", but doesn't accept my gay lifestyle. I finally decided to remove her from my life. I luckily had a highschool friend that had a good family, and took me in and helped me believe in myself. If It hadn't been for my friend's family, I would not be here today, to write this. I am very lucky to have had my friends, but if I only had "my family" to rely on for psychological support, I would have killed myself a long time ago. Kristian (Kris)

  • Name: Jason
    Date posted: 1/28/2009 12:18:00 AM
    Hometown: Wichita Falls, Tx

    Comment:

    Just watched Prayers for Bobby. I am a 25 year old openly gay man. I came out when I was 22 years old. I had a similar experience to Bobby's when I came out. My mother was very religious. Although nowhere near the level that his mother was. She would send me church bulletins and flyers in the mail about how being gay is wrong. Thankfully she has come around and even met my boyfriend of two years. The film was so profound and touched me personally that I was moved to tears. Sigourney Weaver's performance is wonderful. Everyone should see this film!

  • Name: Jeff Zenk
    Date posted: 1/27/2009 11:43:00 PM
    Hometown: Chicago

    Comment:

    To John Harvey THANK YOU!

  • Name: Bob
    Date posted: 1/27/2009 5:18:00 PM
    Hometown: New Jersey

    Comment:

    This movie was even more poignant for me when I found out Bobby was born in 1963, a year after me. I know what it was like to grow up gay in the 1970s. There was NOTHING positive presented about being gay in the media in those days. Once in a while you might catch a 'Phil Donahue show' that was 'tolerant' or 'sympathetic' toward gays but that was about it. While watching this powerful, instructive but ultimately tragic movie I couldn't help thinking what a terrible shame it is that Bobby and I couldn't have seen atleast one movie like 'Prayers for Bobby' on television while we were growing up.

  • Name: Lindon Pearson
    Date posted: 1/27/2009 4:48:00 PM
    Hometown: Atlanta

    Comment:

    The first night this movied aired, I had just finished a very long day. I started watching the movie and I got so damn mad during the first 30min...that I turned it off and went to bed. Being a gay male, it was just heartbreaking to see how ignorant Bobby's mom and family was. So...the second airing, I told myself to give it another try and I'm really glad I did. Sure enough, I cried while watching the movie. This was a well prepared and powerful movie and I think EVERYONE NEEDS TO SEE IT!

  • Name: James Smith
    Date posted: 1/27/2009 1:51:00 PM
    Hometown: San Diego CA

    Comment:

    I read that the producers did leave out some parts of the whole story in order to present a movie that Lifetime, a very mainstream network, could show and promote widely. I can see both sides. Both"halves" of the story could be a stand alone movie. It could have been a mini-series! I hope Lifetime network soon makes it available online so that young closeted gay people can see it easily and in private. That may decrease Lifetime's revenue, but I think it would be a smart move to establish themselves as a source of good quality substantive TV movies that can both educate AND entertain. Perhaps they could have emphasized more that this was a late 70s story.

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