Religious Disobedience 

I come from a very religious family (not Mormon) and although I am straight, my brother is gay and just moved back home after five years away. Although my family loves him with everything they have, it is still difficult for them to see him on a date or hear him talk of a boyfriend. The overall concensus is that he brought this on himself because he "chooses" to be the way he is. They would never consider walking out of church services in protest even though my brother and I both encourage them to do so. Seeing the pain my brother has gone/is going through, my heart goes out to you. Congratulations on finding yourself and your strength; now it is time to let your family find theirs.

I am an ex-mormon and know exactly how he feels. When I first came out to my parents, my mom told me to never ever send her stuff about gay related articles, books, and other materials. I wish him the very best and hope that some or most of his family members show their love and walk out during the reading of the letter. Please let us know what had happened.

Religion is at the heart of almost all problems of homophobia and discrimination of all sorts. Because organized religions require blind faith and adherence. And belief in things that make no sense, and have no proof is a way of life that leads to irrational hatred and prejudice. The men who founded this country were products of the age of reason. This is a wonderful ideal to pursue. Go for it. Why do we want the unreasoning religious people in our life to try to change their beliefs? It's never going to happen. Their religions do not encourage dialogue or inquiry. If you simply walk away from those who build their lives around intolerance, you will be better off. If you lose their love because you won't worship as they feel you should, then what kind of love is that anyway?

This country is moving away from religion by choice and dangerously close to mandated religion of the most politically and monetarily powerful sect. What is happening today is not even close to what our founding fathers intended. That's why they were so careful in writing a constitutional framework that is not supposed to allow religious dogma to dominate the government. Unfortunately for us, when you have a government that simply chooses to ignore the constitution when they don't like what it says, we're all in big trouble! We've seen how well that works for the rank and file populace in the extremist Muslim countries that also have chosen to ignore those parts of their religion (i.e., government) that don't support what they want. That's why it's EXTREMELY IMPORTANT that every single one of us registers and votes in ALL of our elections. It's the one sure way our founders gave us that can, if used, guarantee against that kind of extremism here. VOTE!!

yyou have no civil right in a church...it's a freedom of religion. The mormoms will come around, if other religions do.

Isn't it awful dealing with family members who are so brainwashed? And for them it's more than a faith, it's a social community that could possibly reject them, the same way they rejected you. That's got to be a major fear in their minds, because the church pushed you away without a second thought--and they know it would be the same for them if the conditions of the church's love aren't met. So many of the people who have a vested interest in where you place your mind and money have decided what is right and true about "god," but the truth of life is so much bigger, so much grander, that such pettiness is for those who decide to live in fear. And, like any gay person coming out, it takes courage to overcome fear. And time. Our families don't have the same impetus. It will take them more time.

This must be very hard for you. I do hope that you will find a church or other faith community that accepts you 100% as who you are, and congratulate you for taking a brave and principaled stance with your family. I actually think that if all us contacted our family members and actually asked them to write to their elected representatives or take other direct action to support our civil right we'd be much further along, but we hesitate to do so, even when our families are likely to take the steps we suggest. I wish you all happiness in your future, and bet that at least some of your family does take action based on your request. Please let us know!

Mr. Leavitt you are a very brave man. You know who you are, and what will make you happy. You love your religion, but you are not brain-washed by it. Just let God keep on guiding you, and all will be well. Some men live their entire lives never knowing who they are, and wouldn't know a spiritual thought if it knocked them down.

if you were comfortable with your 'gayness' you wouldnt care what the church or any other religion says about it. Do you wish everyone would accept you and your trick from saturday night in sunday services to aswage your deep down felt guilt? Why do you care what the church says or what your family thinks? Obviously, you dont seeing the final results. You left the family and church and now you are running around whining like a little girl trying to get everyone to agree with you bc of what you feel. Maybe somethings are bigger than you and your penis. (pun intended)

Mr. Leavitt, Kudos to you on taking such a stand. It may feel tough at the moment, but it will get better. I resigned from the Catholic Church in 1997. Best decision of my life. Since then, I have felt stronger connection to spirituality by realizing that faith has very little to do with organized religion. It is a personal journey. Today, my parents still attend church services daily, but both are pro-gay marriage and make it no secret to anyone at their parish that they want to see their son happily married to a man someday. They are educating their Catholic friends from within the walls of their church. I think it's great. It took them time, so don't count out your family members just yet. They may open their eyes and minds in the years to come. Hang in there! Braddoc DeCaires