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N.Y. Official Plans Protest Wedding in Conn.


ScottStringerx180 (Wiki) | Advocate.com

Manhattan borough president Scott Stringer and his fiancee, Elyse Buxbaum, will marry in Connecticut this year to protest the inequality that prevents same-sex couples from marrying in New York.

The New York Times writes about the decision by Stringer and Buxbaum, which they view as an opportunity to take “personal responsibility” and set an example, or maybe even start a trend among different-sex couples.

“If enough people who have somewhat of a profile — not just politicians, but artists and business leaders — start going into Massachusetts or Connecticut and show New York how embarrassing it is that you can’t get a marriage license for same-sex couples, then we will change things,” said Stringer, a native New Yorker and former state assemblyman from the Upper West Side who may run for mayor in 2013.

He and Buxbaum, the director of corporate and government relations at the Jewish Museum, met five years ago. They told the Times that they did not intend to make a statement at first, but the contrast between their freedom and the inequality experienced by close gay friends quickly became obvious and prompted their consciences to act.

The couple will hold a civil marriage ceremony in Connecticut late this summer, and then return to New York for a religious service with a rabbi in September.

Recently, the New York City clerk’s office began offering wedding-like ceremonies for same-sex couples who register for domestic partnerships. City council speaker Christine Quinn, also a likely 2013 mayoral contender, has pressed the clerk’s office to inform same-sex couples of places where they can travel to get married. Same-sex marriages from other states and jurisdictions are recognized in New York. A marriage equality bill failed in the state senate last year.

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Reader Comments
  • Name: Mike
    Date posted: 7/12/2010 2:58:39 PM
    Hometown: Buffalo

    Comment:

    Joseph, I'm from Buffalo, NY. My partner and I can get a marriage ceremony at the local Unitarian Universalist Church, a United Church of Christ, several synagogues, some non-mainstream religions, and even have a secular celebrant perform the ceremony (our preferred choice). What we can't have is the $40 marriage license that secures the same rights straight couples get when they marry and fill out said certificate. Later this year OUTspoken for Equality is hosting an event called "The Wedding of the Decade", the plan is to have same-sex couples have wedding ceremonies performed by various celebrants, and show that several faith groups (and groups that don't adhere to faith) perform wedding ceremonies for same-sex couples. Furthermore, that the recognition of some faiths' definition of marriage is a form of religious discrimination against faiths (or non-faiths) that are more inclusive.

  • Name: Larry
    Date posted: 7/10/2010 6:47:18 PM
    Hometown: NYC

    Comment:

    In response to Joseph in Montgomery: It is very easy to find a religious institution practically anywhere in the U.S. that is willing to do a blessing service for a same-sex couple. That service, however, has no legal standing - a couple doing that is not considered married in most states. It's the legal/civil part that's the important factor here, not the religious.

  • Name: darrin kaneshiro
    Date posted: 7/10/2010 5:47:35 PM
    Hometown: Honolulu

    Comment:

    BRAVO.

  • Name: Joseph
    Date posted: 7/10/2010 3:16:55 PM
    Hometown: Montgomery, AL

    Comment:

    Oooh, what a great story. (Okay, sarcasm off.) Seriously, though, how does their having a civil ceremony in Connecticut THEN having a religious ceremony in New York do anything to show their sympathy for their (purported) gay friends? Most of their gay friends are prohibited from having a religious ceremony in New York (depending entirely on the gay couple's religious affiliation), something which has nothing to do with state law. I don't know. If I were one of their gay friends, I think I'd have to take the couple to task for their having the religious ceremony at all.

  • Name: Dr. D
    Date posted: 7/10/2010 3:02:00 PM
    Hometown: Maui

    Comment:

    David in Houston, Regarding the confusion of Elyse being a woman, fiancee spelled with two e's is the feminine in French (fiance with one e means a man). Heterosexual allies and heterosexual couples have the potential to make powerful statements like taking this action. I look forward to more. I encourage same-sex couples to continue visiting Hawaii despite the dreadful Governor Lingle (a closeted lesbian?) and her horrendous decision to veto civil unions.Her lieutenant governor, Duke Aiona, is even worse; he is a Republican candidate for governor. We look forward to a new administration, and maintain the fight for civil rights and equality for all. Aloha!

  • Name: David
    Date posted: 7/10/2010 1:14:20 PM
    Hometown: Houston

    Comment:

    I think you should clarify that Elyse Buxbaum is a woman. I read the article at first without even realizing it. It then occurred to me that perhaps this was not a same sex couple. I re-read the article to be sure. (I'm not all that familiar with the name Elyse, but it SEEMS like it is probably a womans name, but it wouldn't hurt to clarify this.)

  • Name: Ken
    Date posted: 7/10/2010 10:03:35 AM
    Hometown: USA

    Comment:

    THANK YOU for the showing the support to the GLBT Community



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