Crossing into
conservative Orange County, this Southern California soccer
mom and lesbian continues walking the coastline from San
Diego to San Francisco to raise LGBT visibility. This
is the second of her dispatches from the road
Soccer mom Jennifer Schumaker’s plan to walk the
569 miles from San Diego to San Francisco
“evolved from a very simple
thought,” she tells The Advocate.
“Three years ago I let a man reenter a
line for coffee, and I thought, He has no idea
that a lesbian was nice to him today.”
Thereafter, Jennifer began coming out to everyone
she had even passing contact with in her life.
The Escondido, Calif., carpool mom is now raising
her visibility campaign to another level: walking most
of the way up the California coastline and coming
out to everyone along the way. She left San Diego
on April 8 and plans to reach San Francisco on June 3,
where she’ll meet out state assembly member
Mark Leno.
Along the way, each week she’ll be calling in
to The Advocate to tell her story.
My first week of
walking is behind me, along with the familiar territory
of San Diego and my traveling companion for the first week,
Jo Rock, who returned home. It will be lonelier now,
but it’ll also force me to turn even more to
strangers for human companionship.
Unfortunately, it
also gives me more time to think about how much I miss
my children—I feel there is a rubber band pulling me
back. I have been away from my kids for weeks at a
time when they have gone to visit their grandparents,
but this feels different somehow. I know each step carries
me further from them, but I also know I am doing this for
them. One of the motives for this walk is that if my
son, who is now 7, turns out to be gay, as he thinks
he is, I want him to be able to go to his first dance
with the person of his choosing. I’d like him to be
free to be who he is. Although societal acceptance is
coming, it isn’t coming soon enough for me or
my family. If I can open a few minds and hearts along
the way, it will have been worth the 500-plus miles.
The Pacific Ocean—not a bad view for a hike.
I found one such
opportunity when I stopped for lunch in Carlsbad. I
noticed a young man, perhaps 16 years old, in front of me in
line. I thought he looked like what one of my other
sons would look like in a few years. I was about to
tell him this when he yelled to his friend, “Come
over here, faggot.” He meant it as a joke, but I
immediately and politely explained to him how these
supposedly meaningless generic insults (like
“That’s so gay”) hurt gay people and
make young people afraid to come out. One of his
friends said, by way of apology, “I don’t know
this guy.” I explained the mission I was on,
the young man apologized for his
“faggot” comment, and they all wished me well
on my trip. One of their others friends said,
“You could totally be his mom.”
Those are the
moments this trip is about.
Walking into
Orange County, in parts so homogenous that it’s a
stereotype of itself, I saw some Rolls Royces and a
Bentley, and it seemed as though they should be
filming a TV show here. At the Starbucks in Dana Point,
where I was to rendezvous with my African-American support
drivers, I was thinking, This lesbian, her
transgender traveling companion, and the two black
women about to arrive added more diversity to this
coffee shop than it had probably seen in a long
time—if ever.
Jo Rock's bandaged feet after a few days on the road.
I was alone and
it was raining when I hit Laguna Beach. I was cold and
wet and sniffling and felt like I was getting a fever. When
I saw the rainbow flag above a store it was like a
beacon offering shelter from the storm. When my
support driver, also drawn by the rainbow, found me there,
I knew it was a sign that the sun would shine on the rest of
my walk.
As told to Walter G. Meyer.
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Jennifer’s supporters are encouraged to wear
rainbow ribbons along the route. For more
information about the walk, visit Jennifer’s site
at www.walkfortogetherness.org. Photos
courtesy Jennifer Schumaker