Justin Theroux

Reviewing your oeuvre, I noticed you go shirtless quite a bit. I’m not shirtless quite a bit! I was shirtless for Charlie’s Angels, but what else?

Sex and the City, Six Feet Under, Muse’s “Hysteria” music video… Oh, yeah, that’s true. I was actually completely naked in Six Feet Under. That was completely terrifying. Actually, the only reason I did that music video was because it was right after Charlie’s Angels and I was already primed for it. I worked really hard for Charlie’s Angels. It was one of those situations where someone else was paying for the trainer and the diet, so it was kind of the way Oprah does it. I’ll never do that again, and I’ll never be in that great of shape again. I wouldn’t do the same video today.

Hopefully you reaped the benefits of that bod in your personal life. I had a girlfriend, so I was all set. She got to enjoy an upward fluctuation in our relationship.

Did you know you recently lost out on the title of PETA’s “sexiest vegetarian” to The Tonight Show’s bandleader, Kevin Eubanks? I did? Fucking Eubanks! Wait, who is Kevin Eubanks? That’s crazy. Just tell him to wait till next year.

Who’d you base your Jesus on in The Ten? I just read Scripture day and night. I tried to live like Jesus, walk like Jesus, talk like Jesus — sort of a “What would Jesus do?” No, I was like a Latin lover Jesus — more Julio Iglesias than J.C. But it’s a big deal to join that club: [Jim] Caviezel, [Willem] Dafoe, me. [Laughs] I used to tear tickets at a movie theater, so I saw The Last Temptation of Christ, like, 600 times.

Which commandment do you break most often? Worshipping false idols, I guess. I don’t even know what that means. Like, um, Kelly Clarkson? What are they again — lying, stealing…?

Adultery, coveting stuff… I don’t covet my neighbors’ wives, but I do covet stuff. Is that a commandment? Thou Shalt Not Covet Stuff? I covet a lot of Amy’s shit, actually. She gave one of the things that I coveted, which is a picture of a girl with syphilis that she named Phyllis. She’s got a great old medical poster of a kid with rickets and big funny bowlegs. I really want that. Make sure that’s in the article so she knows that!

If your name were a verb — as in “Man, I totally Therouxed that” — what would it mean? God, that’s a hard one. But it would probably be something amazing.

Might it involve taking off your shirt? [Laughs] Yeah, totally. It would involve taking off your shirt and throwing up simultaneously while your shirt’s over your head.