Best Tweet Ever — Or, at Least, This Week
Every week, The Advocate's Jami Smith brings you the top 10 tweets from LGBT comedians — and our favorite gay jokes from straight comedians, or just whatever made us laugh. For previous editions of this series, check out the Comedy section. Or follow @gaysayer on Twitter now if you want daily updates.
And now a post from your host:
I rearranged all of your furniture while you were out. I thought it'd be a nice surprise to change everything about you.
— Jami Smith (@jamismithcomic) December 15, 2011
Khloe Kardashian down to relocate if Lamar is traded. Said she’d follow him anywhere with a strong paparazzi presence & a Lane Bryant!— Lisa Lampanelli (@LisaLampanelli) December 10, 2011
Every high school kid in a wheelchair is under intense pressure to join the glee club.— Jocelyn Plums (@FilthyRichmond) December 15, 2011
How bout we let gays get married but not the people on Top Chef who constantly call dishes "playful"?— Chris Kelly (@imchriskelly) December 16, 2011
If I were a lesbian I'd tweet awesome shit like, "I'm GLAAD it's not raining men." then I'd score tons of pussy.— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) December 13, 2011
Just downloaded the new sequel to Angry Birds. It's called Angry Dykes and it involves rebuilding all those destroyed pig houses.— Adam Lehman (@AtomLehman) December 12, 2011
This year my secretary's Christmasbonus will be me eating a banana and making intense eye contact with him.— Ezra Pounding (@SomeSadThings) December 15, 2011
I need a boob job. Something clerical.— Claudia Cogan (@blaudiablogan) December 12, 2011
Maybe I'm straight and just haven't met a guy who's good with a strapon.— alison egert (@alisonisfunny) December 11, 2011
I cannot decide which is a more relevant issue to the gay community: vampirism or bullying.— Guy Branum (@guybranum) December 13, 2011
Number 1, Best Tweet Ever:
Your Daily AstrologyCANCER (June 21-July 22): Newt Gingrich will leave you on your deathbed for a younger Zodiac sign.— Nick Stadler (@NickadooLA) December 16, 2011