#Throwback Thursday: Is Your Body Bathing Suit Ready?

#Throwback Thursday: Is Your Body Bathing Suit Ready?

Yep. It's past Memorial Day. You put it off far too long, and you really can't skip a whole summer. Perhaps these glimpses of high-waisted, strappy, liner-less suits from the past will help inspire you to pull it together. Or, like me, you can sign up for the Bacon-of-the-Month Club.

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Women aren't the only victims of perfect-body expectations. This 1938 Janzten ad shows the original inspiration for Barbie's legs. On a man.

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Sudden bathing suit strap drop syndrome. Get vaccinated.

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Belted for your pleasure.

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"R" stands for Really Fit.

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Rock Hudson in a tasteful square-cut.

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Up to no good on Bondi Beach in the '30s.

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Before and after shots. Brylcreem adds such lovely highlights to the thighs.

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Rudolph Valentino, before the invention of bathing suit liners.

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Take your pick. Many selections available for those with belly button modesty issues.

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I have to go lie down for a minute. Caption this one yourself.

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Something super gay is going on here. Not quite sure what. I'm sure our readers will help.

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Made you look!

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Remember when Dad used to go out with that dirty cushion and lie right down on the dock? Oh, the splinters were something awful.

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Sal Mineo in Who Killed Teddy Bear? 1965

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Rock Hudson and George Nader rubbing flanks.

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"Stop it! Stop it! No! I won't be your beard!"

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Tab Hunter and Rudolf Nureyev should probably get a room.

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Feeling very "Colonel" these days. Damn cronuts.

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Plaid about the boy.

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Caution: White bathing suits can become completely transparent when wet on the beaches of North Africa.

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More "pre-liner" bathing suits. In fact, not sure these are even bathing suits. More like tattered bits of stretchy fabric that have lost all sense of support and decency.

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Monty Clift in an "up-shorts" shot.

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It's a MAN'S BATHING SUIT, damn it. It says so in huge letters.

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Cunning '70s suits. But those hip zippers are going to be quite twisty when you need to take a leak.
Tags: Comedy, Comedy