Day of Decision Op-ed: My Life Isn't a Gamble

We asked readers for personal stories about how the U.S. Supreme Court's highly anticipated ruling on the Defense of Marriage Act has consequences for their own lives. Dante Savant and his partner have been relying on luck. They believe it's time for the federal government to pull their lucky number.

BY Dante Savant

June 18 2013 3:00 AM ET

The Day of Decision will either be a day of utter bliss or utter disappointment for many of us. I will be anxiously awaiting the Supreme Court ruling with my heart in my throat — the same way that I did when the decision for my partner’s U.S. residency application was going to be released. In the latter case, utter disappointment and anger followed.

I live abroad with my European partner. Per the current law, I have no way to sponsor him for any type of companion visa, let alone permanent residency. So we rely on his application to the green card lottery every year. No luck yet. For us, the overturning of the Defense of Marriage Act is about much more than being recognized as a couple by the government. It’s a matter of having to choose between the country I love and call home, and the man I love with whom I’ve built a home. As of now, these choices are mutually exclusive.

As the Supreme Court hashes out the rationales for or against DOMA and Proposition 8 in these two high-profile cases, I can only hope the justices think of all the couples and all the families affected, that they truly celebrate the American spirit of freedom and equality. They may, or they may not.

But whether bliss or disappointment fills my day, I will find solace in knowing that our wait isn’t forever. I will be comforted in knowing that the days are imminent when my love will be treated equally, and my partner will be called husband, and we will be respected in the land which I call home. And when this happens, we will play the lottery no more.

 

DANTE SAVANT is a freelance writer, model, and blogger who lives in Norway. Follow him @DanteSavant. WHAT DO YOU PLAN TO DO, LARGE OR SMALL, ON THE DAY OF DECISION? Send us an essay about how you plan to mark that day and what it will mean to you personally at [email protected]

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