"I Want to See Your Legs"  | PROJECT RUNWAY | Advocate.com

Advocate.com health Channel
||  PROJECT RUNWAY  ||
Comments (0)Post a CommentTag this page  Page: 1 | 2 | 3
 
"I Want to See Your Legs"
This week's Project Runway is demure about décolletage but heavy on the hate. Thank God
An Advocate.com exclusive posted July 21, 2006

Wow, the people who make this show are already giving me the whiplash of confusion. All my opinions about the contestants have changed after watching this second episode. Except for Tim Gunn. I will always love you, Tim Gunn.

But first let's talk about me. As with last week's recap, I believe it's very important that you know what I'm wearing while I write and also what I believe about fashion things this week. Because if you don't care about that, then we're not down, you and me.

My Recapping Outfit: Instead of the silvery women's Balenciaga cape I just saw Andre Leon Talley photographed in—because he can, that's why—I am wearing a red T-shirt from Kreuz Market (it's this mind-bogglingly excellent ribs place in Lockhart, Texas, a little bit up the road from Stinky Hippieville, I mean, Austin). I also have on some chocolate-brown Dickies covering some very full-cut blue grandpa boxer shorts that you can pretty much only get from Neiman Marcus because every other stupid store on the planet cuts things for men with no meat on their asses and thighs anymore, and some new brown Converse Chuck Taylors. Black socks. I look really good.

And now for the three fashion things I think are awesome this week:

1. Jeremy Scott's bangle bracelets that are shaped like huge frosted donuts. Someone tell me where I can buy one. I just want to have it on my desk.

2. The T-shirt I saw on a woman in Madrid last week (yeah, I was for-real there, visiting all 3,000 members of my partner's extended family). She was chunky and had giant boobs, and her shirt said “Quieres Mirar.” (English = “You want to look.”)

3. No one is making better dresses than Costello Tagliapietra (it's two guys, not one) right now. Check them out at www.JCRT.net. If they made menswear, I'd puke my way into one of their creations, pronto.

OK, the show:

The opening credits: I didn't see them last week because I was watching a rough cut DVD from Bravo and I guess they weren't ready yet. Anyway, this week I finally get to see them, and I just want to say that if someone didn't put Jeffrey up to saying “I got mad skillz!” and he just popped out with that all by himself, then he's got a brain tumor. And P.S., I called him Jeffrey Tattoo Neck last week because he has DETROIT tattooed on his neck, but I just now figured out that he's got CHRIST inked on his hand. So his new name from now on in this recap will be Jeffrey Christ. It just sounds more important a name than Jeffrey Detroit, don't you think? Then you see Malan the Evil Gay saying “I'm better than they are.” The only thing that would make that sentence more incredible would be if he were holding a white Persian cat with emerald-green eyes and softly stroking its fur. Or if he had a laser. Or if he had a white Persian cat that shot lasers from its emerald-green eyes.

Like I said, everything's gone all rug-pulley-out-from-under-me this week. The bad are good and the good are bad. The insane are still insane, but Michael Kors has gone missing and the judges have lost their way. Unlike the first episode, where it seemed like they just focused on the guys, the women get their personalities a little more fleshed out tonight.

The rooms the contestants had to destroy last week to make their outfits are back to normal. Or else they all moved into new apartments at Atlas New York. No one's saying. But it's all pretty-pretty again this week with the living environment. Now, the way most reality shows work is that if you get axed early on, you pretty much get a free hotel room for several weeks until the show eventually airs so that the folks back in Ann Arbor who know you are kept in the dark as to whether you won. You go home when everyone else goes home. You don't really have to pack your bags and leave when Heidi says “You [sic] out.” So in my fantasy, Stacey Estrella—last week's choppee—has to go live in the ripped-to-shreds apartment. And one by one the place gets filled up with human discards, all sleeping on twin beds that are just coils and tatters.

Page: 1 | 2 | 3
Dave White is the author of Exile in Guyville and thinks more people should dress like the late Wendy O. Williams. He can be found at www.imdavewhite.com .
From the archives of The Advocate and Advocate.com

Reader Comments

These comments are reproduced as written by visitors to this Web site. They have not been edited for content, grammar, or spelling. The viewpoints appearing here are those of the writer, and do not necessarily reflect the opinion or views of advocate.com, The Advocate, or its affiliates.

Be the first to comment on this story.

Back to top

Submit a comment for this story:

*Type your comment here (Required, 1000 characters max.):

*Name (Required): 

*Hometown (Required): 

*E-mail address: (Required, but will not be displayed)

Is this comment for publication? 
Yes   No

Daytime phone number: (Required for print publication only and will not be displayed)

Please enter the words you see in the box, in order and separated by a space. Doing so helps prevent automated programs from abusing this service.

  

If you would like to submit a comment for posting, please fill out the form above. 

All comments submitted via this form are subject to posting or publication. (To send a private letter to an Advocate editor or writer, please use the e-mail button at the top of the page, or use snail mail.) If you would like your comment considered for publication in The Advocate magazine, please include your full name, your city of residence, and a phone number where you can be reached during business hours so that we can confirm your identity. Your e-mail address and telephone number are strictly confidential and will not be shared or used for any purpose other than to contact you about your comment.

Comments that do not concern specific articles in The Advocate or on Advocate.com will not be posted or published. See the Contact page for sending comments for reasons other than responding to Advocate editorial and news stories.

Please note that comments sent by fax or snail mail are unlikely to be posted, although they will be considered for publication along with all letters received via e-mail or via this Web page. Comments that chiefly concern Advocate.com content will be considered for posting only on the Web site. The Advocate reserves the right to edit submitted comments for grammar, spelling, obscenities, or libel; we will, however, do our best to preserve the original comment's style and intent. Comments considered for publication in The Advocate magazine may also be edited for length.

More Exclusives
  • Building Bridges in the Wake of Prop. 8
    In the wake of finger-pointing following California's passing of Prop. 8, television writer and producer Tajamika Paxton suggests the time has come to build a bridge between the LGBT and African-American communities -- to engage in discussion rather than looking for somewhere to place blame.
  • Without Her We're Nothing
    The legendary Sandra Bernhard sits down with The Advocate before the one-night-only revival of her seminal one-woman show Without You I'm Nothing in Los Angeles to discuss Tori Amos, why Prop. 8 is "the best thing that could happen to the gay community," and how she she could possibly love both Rachel Maddow and Rachel Zoe.
  • Carmen Finds Her Spotlight
    It’s not very often that a lowly music critic gets the privilege of witnessing a glowing performance by a major new talent at the beginning of his or her career, but that is certainly what happened to yours truly on the evening of November 15 at the Los Angeles Opera. Viktoria Vizin, an astounding new mezzo-soprano making her L.A. Opera debut as Carmen this season, took my breath away.
  • Connecticut Gets Married
    This weekend, all 50 states participated in protests against the passing of antigay legislation in California, Arizona, Arkansas, and Florida. Gays and lesbians in Connecticut protested too, but they also had reason to celebrate. Last week, same-sex marriages got under way throughout the state.
  • Gay Is the New Black?
    In the wake of California’s passage of Proposition 8, protests are popping up around the country -- and so are comparisons between gays’ and African-Americans’ fights for equality. Is gay the new black? Michael Joseph Gross examines two struggles for civil rights. Plus: Photos from Wednesday night's rally in New York City.
  • The Day in Pictures
    From coast to coast, from gay to straight, from Pink to Mormon moms--a national movement to protest the passing of Prop. 8 in California rises up.
  • Smart Money
    In a time of economic calamity, one voice rises above the panic. Suze Orman is here to help -- she's offered her will and trust kit free to Advocate readers. Click the story for more info.
  • David Hyde Pierce is Gay, Married ... and Marching Against Prop. 8
    As Dr. Niles Crane on the hit sitcom Frasier, David Hyde Pierce had a great deadpan. That also extended to his own life: For years he wouldn’t confirm or deny being gay. Since then he thawed enough to thank his longtime partner, Brian Hargrove, in his 2007 Tony Award acceptance speech. And on Saturday, Pierce was one baseball-capped protester among maybe 20,000 others marching for equality in Los Angeles.
  • Gearing Up
    From Long Beach to Toronto, activists begin to prepare for a weekend of protest -- including the "Raging Grannies" in Palo Alto. See it all come together.
  • Best of Times, Worst of Times
    In the week after Barack Obama’s historic victory, gays and lesbians are pondering another historic, albeit less victorious, moment of their own. Three anti-gay marriage propositions passed -- in Florida, Arizona, and California. In Arkansas gay people were barred from adopting children. Now the real fight begins.
  • Revolution No. 8
    I've been waving a sign on street corners since H8 passed: "Black Queers." Responses have varied -- from honks of support to looks of disapproval from both blacks and whites. A black woman came up to me at a rally and asked me if I didn't think the sign was offensive to black people. I said, "It's who I am, and people should know."
  • You Can Never Go Home Again
    Eight years ago Advocate associate editor Neal Broverman packed up his car and moved from Connecticut to California to find freedom and acceptance. Now that marriage is legal in Connecticut, he's wondering if he ever should have left.
  • Prop. 8 Rally Takes Manhattan
    On the same day that the state of Connecticut began allowing same-sex marriages, thousands of New Yorkers gathered to protest the recent ruling in California taking away those same rights. Over 15,000 people gathered Wednesday night in protest of Proposition 8, the California ballot initiative that overturned a recent court ruling allowing same-sex marriage.
  • Calif. Senators Leno, Migden on Post-Prop. 8 Movement
    Forty-four California state senators and assembly members on Monday signed a friend-of-the-court brief to support lawsuits seeking to overturn Proposition 8, which voters passed last week, banning same-sex marriage. Senator-elect Mark Leno, author of the "only marriage equality bills to reach a governor's desk," and Sen. Carole Migden were among the petitioners.
  • London, 007 Style
    Bond has firmly swashbuckled into the 21st century in the form of hunky Daniel Craig, who is bursting onto screens in the brand-new Quantum of Solace. Although he's better known as a global jet-setter, James’s hometown of London holds many of the keys to his persona -- it's where he dressed, ate, slept, and had his hair done. Here’s your chance to swagger in his footsteps and imagine your travels are on Her Majesty’s Secret Service expense account.
  • Role Model
    Jack Mackenroth of Project Runway season 4 unveiled his new HIV/AIDS education campaign on Monday night at the Gay Men's Health Crisis Fashion Forward benefit in New York City. Called "Living Positive by Design" and sponsored by Merck and Co., the initiative seeks to combat the stigmatization of people living with HIV.
  • Gaga for the Lady
    Lady Gaga cavorts in couture. She only dons platinum wigs that suggest the presence of radioactivity. And she yells for you to dance, all in tribute to her favorite muse -- fame.
  • Terminated: Commercial Closet's Executive Director
    Since early this year, Commercial Closet Association has been in negotiations with GLAAD to dissolve into one advertising media program overseen by the larger nonprofit. But CCA founder Michael Wilke says he was supposed to join GLAAD in this new joint venture. Then on Monday, CCA's board announced the merger -- and Wilke's termination...which Wilke says took him completely by surprise. The board says that's hard to believe and that Wilke was told he'd been terminated November 4.
  • Side of Guac With Your Hate?
    L.A. eatery El Coyote, long known for attracting a heavily LGBT client base, is facing the heat now that bloggers have revealed one of the managers, who is a niece of the original owners, had donated to the pro-Proposition 8 campaign. El Coyote's answer: a free lunch/press conference giving her a forum to explain her decision. But the 70-some people in attendance were none too pleased with what they heard. Is a boycott the answer?