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I am not the enemy

A year fighting for equality has left our high school diarist with lousy grades and an e-mailbox full of anger from bisexuals who misunderstood his last posting. Don't we have better ways to expend our energy?
An Advocate.com exclusive posted September 14, 2006
I am not the enemy

Satre is a senior at Notre Dame Academy, a private Catholic high school in Middleburg, Va., and the founder of the Virginia LGBT activist group Equality Fauquier-Culpeper. He writes journal entries for The Advocate.

Herein lies both a confession and a rebuttal.

I am an actor, an activist, a freelance journalist, and a senior in a Catholic high school. Among other things I am gay. The difference between where I am now and where I want to be is that where I am now, I am perceived solely as gay; where I want to be is a place where sexual orientation does not define my character. Maybe that is outside of my small Catholic school in Middleburg, Va. Maybe it is outside of my hometown of Culpeper. Perhaps I need to leave Virginia and find some other home where sexual orientation is not a deciding factor for a person’s persona.

For just over a year I have been working tirelessly alongside thousands of my colleagues around the country to further the movement for equality. I speak of equality for local cases in regard to gender discrimination, specifically for women who have been targeted in the workplace or who have been subject to domestic violence. I speak of equality for the black community, especially in Culpeper, as an active member of the Culpeper Branch of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People. I speak of equality for people of varying economic status, especially in the LGBT community, defending their voices in the press and in private meetings with national organization officials. I speak of equality for the youth of the United States, especially in Virginia and around the East Coast as an advocate for teenagers and people in their 20s suffering from societal barriers because of their sexual orientation.

I have not told anyone this, not even my parents. Last year, my junior year of high school, which is also known as the cardinal year in high school, I knowingly allowed my grades to slip. I went from having a solid 3.5 GPA to becoming a C student in most of my classes. For the past few weeks I have been filling out college applications, one in particular to a dream school of mine, and I know that last year’s grades are not suitable for any of the colleges I want to attend. Admissions officers will look at my shameful transcripts and will not care about an explanation as to why those grades slipped.

Last year, my junior year in high school, I missed more school days than any other student. I traveled around the East Coast, making frequent visits to Richmond, Va.; Washington, D.C.; and New York City. What for? Myself? Not a chance. I did it for you, the person reading this article. I did it for the kid I met 15 minutes ago down the road who was kicked out of his house because he came out as bisexual to his single mother. She said that bisexuality was not only an abomination to God but did not exist. I did it for my friend who was kicked out of his house after telling his father, a Christian minister, that he was going to have a sex change. I did it because anyone in my position would have done it. I did it because it was the right thing to do and the right time to do it. So what if my grades slipped? I probably will not make it into my dream school. I have probably hindered my career in theater. But you know what? I. Don’t. Care.

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You can contact Satre at tully@tullysatre.com or via his MySpace page at myspace.com/whitedeosil.
From the archives of The Advocate and Advocate.com

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