
I never came out of the closet. I was never in the closet. Well, I suppose you're born in the closet and when you realize that you're gay, you then take steps to tell the people around you. So yes, I suppose I was in the closet. It took me a little bit of time to admit it to myself and then a little bit of time to tell my friends and ultimately, my parents. Oh, and I had to tell each and every one of my five siblings when the time felt right. Having done all of that, I was then cast to play a young lovesick gay man in the movie On-Line. It then occurred to me that it would come up in interviews. Was I, like the character, gay? I figured publications like The Advocate and Out magazine would ask. Well, when the movie premiered at Sundance, the movie's director scheduled my partner, Charles, and me to make an appearance at the Gay Brunch where I would be interviewed by gay publications. He never asked me if I wanted to attend. I think he just assumed that, since I was so completely out in my life, I wouldn't have a problem doing gay-related publicity for the movie. So I went. I met with Lawrence Ferber, who wanted to write an article about me for The Advocate when the movie was released. And I met Jeffrey Epstein, who wanted to do a piece about me for Out (they went on to name me the "Hottest Up-and-Coming Openly Gay Actor" of 2003). I called my agent and asked him what he thought—whether or not he thought it was a bad career move—and he told me it would be no problem for me. And so that was that.
The movie was released, and the articles came out. Other publications wanted interviews, and I did them as well. None of these were really about "coming out," though, because it's not as if I'd been famous before these articles were published. People like Nathan Lane, Ellen DeGeneres, and Rosie O'Donnell came out of the closet after establishing their careers. I was out before anything happened to me. And things turned out OK. It was still a struggle to get jobs, as it is for straight people. It's a competitive business. But I did OK, and I wasn't typecast as gay. Now there is nothing wrong with playing gay roles. And when people asked me if I was worried about being typecast as gay, I would say "I have no problem with being typecast as employed." But it was cool that I got to play straight roles. I wasn't typecast. I went on to play a man in a mental hospital who falls in love with a female patient in the Off-Broadway play Constellations. I had a nude scene with her and kissed her onstage. I was openly gay and still got cast in such a role. I made out with a girl on Law & Order: Criminal Intent and kissed Oscar winner Estelle Parsons in the world premiere of the musical version of Harold and Maude.
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