Slain Lesbian Soldier Ciara Durkin Remembered  | News | Advocate.com

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October 09, 2007
Slain Lesbian Soldier Ciara Durkin Remembered

An estimated 2,000 mourners, including Sen. John Kerry and Massachusetts governor Deval Patrick, filled St. John the Baptist Church in Quincy, Mass., on Saturday, for the funeral mass for out lesbian Army Spc. Ciara Durkin, a 30-year-old Army National Guard corporal who was found dead of a gunshot wound to the head on September 28 at Bagram Air Base in Afghanistan.

Durkin, the first LGBT soldier to die in Afghanistan or Iraq, was remembered as quirky, as someone you couldn't help but love, as "Ciara with the wild red hair," the refrain from a poem written by her sister, Aine Durkin, that she read, first in Gaelic and then in English.

Durkin moved from Ireland to Massachusetts with her parents and younger brother, Pierce Durkin, who is also gay, when she was 9. Mourners paid homage to both Durkin's Irish roots and American citizenry, in song and in word. The sermon, given by the Reverend Raymond Kiley, drew on family remembrances of the fallen soldier and from Mitch Albom, author of The Five People You Meet in Heaven.

Durkin's girlfriend, Haidee Loreto, identified in the program as Durkin's "best friend," spoke briefly during the "Prayers of the Faithful" part of the service, as did a few of Durkin's 18 nieces and nephews.

Durkin's brother, Pierce, gave the eulogy, recounting a time that he and his sister went to an Alzheimer's clinic where she volunteered and how much her being there meant to the patients. One woman, said Pierce, approached Ciara and said, "I don't know who you are, but I know I love you."

And this, he added, was the beauty of Ciara.

"When you think of her smiling face, you think of a time when she made your day brighter. She was unselfish to a fault, and her physical well-being didn't matter. It was our well-being that made her happy," he said.

A "graveside" military service followed the religious ceremony, as Durkin's body will be cremated and a portion of her ashes taken home to Ireland, buried with full military honors in Arlington, Va., and remain with her family in Quincy. Major General Joseph Carter, the adjutant general of the Massachusetts National Guard, handed Durkin's mother, Angela, several posthumous commendations awarded Durkin, including the rank of corporal.

After the ceremony, a gathering was held at the Quincy Yacht Club in Hough's Neck. A motorcade of cars made its way slowly from the church to the yacht club, passing signs at the entrance of the town in English and in Gaelic that thanked Durkin for her service. Outside of the Hough's Neck Fire Department, firefighters stood with hands clasped in front of them, and American flags lined the streets.

Servicemembers Legal Defense Network has demanded a full and thorough investigation into Durkin's death, which remains mysterious. "Specialist Durkin's family deserves to know what happened," said Aubrey Sarvis, SLDN executive director, in a statement last week. "Though we have no evidence, at the moment, to conclude that this was a hate-motivated crime, numerous questions demand that military leaders must search for the answers."

The Department of Defense says its investigation into her death, described simply as a "non-combat-related incident," remains ongoing. It has not disclosed whether a weapon was found near her body, leaving some to speculate that Durkin may have killed herself. But her family does not think that's possible.

"She was home for two weeks in September and helped paint our sister's porch and my nephew's room and we talked about buying a house together when she returned home," said Pierce. "She was describing how she wanted a big bathroom and a living room. She was in the best form and in the best mood, so I do not think it's possible to be in such a wonderful mood and to do a 180 like that."

Durkin was also engaged to be married to Loreto, who has not yet spoken to the media. (William Henderson, The Advocate)

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