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Family of Man Who
Died in Bondage Sex Act Files Lawsuit

Family of Man Who
Died in Bondage Sex Act Files Lawsuit

Adrian Exley was wrapped tightly in heavy plastic, then bound with duct tape. A leather hood was put over his head, with a thin plastic straw inserted for air, and he was shut in a closet. It may not have been exactly what the 32-year-old stripper from London had been expecting when he traveled to Boston to stay with a man he met through a bondage Web site. Exley's body was discovered last June, two months after he was bound up in a ''playroom'' Gary LeBlanc built in the basement of his suburban Boston home.

Adrian Exley was wrapped tightly in heavy plastic, then bound with duct tape. A leather hood was put over his head, with a thin plastic straw inserted for air, and he was shut in a closet.

It may not have been exactly what the 32-year-old stripper from London had been expecting when he traveled to Boston to stay with a man he met through a bondage and sadomasochism Web site.

Exley's body was discovered last June, two months after he was bound up in a bondage ''playroom'' Gary LeBlanc built in the basement of his suburban Boston home.

LeBlanc -- a 48-year-old Gulf Oil sales executive -- detailed his responsibility in the fatal bondage session in a five-page suicide note, just before he put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger.

Now the question is: Since Exley consented to the sex, is he responsible for his own death?

Exley's family has sued LeBlanc's estate, claiming wrongful death. And many in the bondage community are keeping careful watch on the case, seeing it as lesson in where to draw the line of responsibility on consensual -- but dangerous -- sexual activity.

''There's definitely the whole spectrum of thought on what really happened -- whether it was a consent issue, or negligence or misunderstanding,'' said Vivienne Kramer, a board member of the New England Leather Alliance. ''Everybody has their own ideas on what should have happened.''

Exley and LeBlanc met through an online forum for gay men into rubber, leather, and bondage. Exley, a stripper and entertainer, used the screen name ''Studpup,'' while LeBlanc called himself ''Rubrman'' and built a chamber complete with rubber mats on the floors and walls, chains, leather restraints, rubber suits, and a hospital gurney.

John Andrews, a lawyer for LeBlanc's estate, said Exley knew what he was getting into when he agreed to visit LeBlanc.

''It appears from all the objective evidence that the two were engaged in an activity that they both knew what the activity was, how it would be carried out, and they went forward on that basis,'' Andrews said. ''What occurred was an act or actions between two consenting adults, both of whom knew what they were doing, and it had a tragic end.''

Exley arrived at LeBlanc's house in Lynn on April 20, 2006. The pair had plans for LeBlanc to be the ''master'' and Exley his ''slave.'' In e-mails cited in the lawsuit, LeBlanc had expressed a desire to totally dominate someone, and he referred to Exley as ''it.''

The lawsuit describes a three-day-long bondage and discipline session that ended when a third man, Scott Vincent, discovered Exley was not breathing. Exley had been put in a closet while bound in plastic up to his neck and left alone for several hours, according to the lawsuit.

In his suicide note, LeBlanc admits that during the encounter, Exley ''had some type of problem'' and had trouble breathing. But he said that after ''cooling him down,'' Exley improved. LeBlanc said that he went to sleep about 3 a.m. on April 23, but was woken up a few hours later by Vincent, who told him Exley ''was not breathing, was blue and getting cold.''

LeBlanc said he panicked, then came up with a plan to dispose of Exley's body. He and Vincent drove to Rhode Island, where they buried Exley's body in the Rockville Wildlife Management Area. They threw away his clothing and identification ''in the hope that he would never be found,'' LeBlanc wrote.

Vincent, a flight attendant who is also named as a defendant in the Exley lawsuit, is charged with failure to report a death -- a misdemeanor -- in Rhode Island, where Exley's body was found. But he has not been charged criminally in Massachusetts, where Exley died. His lawyer, Susan Perkins, said that ''speaks volumes'' about his minimal role in Exley and LeBlanc's encounter.

In his note, LeBlanc said he was ''responsible for a horrible tragedy.''

''I am taking my life because I did not responsibly take care of your beloved 'Chip,''' LeBlanc wrote. ''Had I dealt with the first crisis responsibly, he would likely have returned home safely.''

Lawyers for Exley's estate acknowledge that Exley wanted to participate in a bondage session with LeBlanc, but they say he did not know about LeBlanc's reputation as an ''extreme edge player'' in the bondage and sadomasochism community.

''Just because you are agreeing that you will allow someone to tie you up temporarily as part of role-playing doesn't mean that you are consenting to be killed or to be left alone or to be abused,'' attorney Randy Chapman said.

Several people who came forward after Exley's death told police that LeBlanc had restrained them and left them alone for long periods of time, or ignored their requests that he curtail a bondage session. Both actions go against the community's protocols, which say participants must stop the session if their partner uses a prearranged ''safe word'' or ''safe signal'' and must not leave anyone who is bound alone, said Susan Wright, a spokeswoman for the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom, an advocacy organization for consenting adults with alternative lifestyles.

Brian Plant, a bondage and sadomasochism practitioner from Kansas, said he corresponded online with LeBlanc, but decided against meeting him in person after talking to him on the phone.

''He said, 'If I want to, I can kidnap you and keep you as long as I want,''' said Plant.

Plant, who had also corresponded with Exley online, said members of the bondage community, who are generally secretive because of their alternative lifestyles, have debated the level of responsibility each man had in their deadly encounter.

''Yes, they were consensual adults, and when they met up there was going to be this adult consensual activity, but no, I don't buy that it was consensual right up to the moment he died,'' Plant said. ''Nobody goes into these things saying, 'Oh, well, I'm going to die because of it.' You reach a point when the line is crossed, and it is no longer consensual.''

Kathy Jo Cook, an attorney who specializes in wrongful death cases, said that when you take away the sensational details of the Exley case, the claim being made by Exley's estate is the same claim made in many other wrongful death cases.

''The law says if a person causes the death of another person by an act which is either negligent or reckless, that person is liable,'' Cook said. ''You have a duty to behave reasonably. I think it's the same thing here, albeit a very strange set of facts.''

Exley's mother, Maggie Horner, from Blaby, Leicester, said she decided to sue LeBlanc's estate after learning about the suicide note in which LeBlanc described going to sleep after binding up Exley. The note also described how he said goodbye to his loved ones and spelled out his final wishes before he shot himself in a Wal-Mart parking lot in Claremont, N.H.

''We decided that we didn't want Gary's last wishes being granted when Adrian's couldn't be,'' she said. ''Why should Gary be able to kill my son, bury my son, shoot himself, and still get his own way?''

The lawsuit, pending in Essex superior court in Salem, does not specify damages sought. (Denise Lavoie, AP)

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