BY David Moretti
March 17 2010 7:05 PM ET
If you work out at LA
Fitness, you just moved here from the South and it sounded logical. You
will leave this gym within one year.
If you work out at the YMCA,
your gym choice says you are from New York City and you hate Los Angeles,
as this is basically a place to bitch about how much L.A. sucks
compared to New York. You also talk about things like the horrid theater
scene while drinking something made of natural ingredients that you
bought from Whole Foods Market, having driven there in your Prius from
your loft downtown. You don’t realize that everyone in L.A. secretly hopes
you will just go back home.
If you work out at Bally — I have no
idea who goes to Bally. You probably saw a commercial during the
first act of Days of Our Lives while sitting at home doing nothing that
afternoon waiting for your agent to call.
So, in a rather large
nutshell, this is what your L.A. gym says about you. Really, it’s up to
you what you do once inside, and you can get a great workout anywhere
if you set your mind to it, but now you know what you’ll find when you
get there. Just know that in L.A.’s gay scene, your gym choice is an
extension of your identity, and you will be judged based on it whether
you think so or not. It’s the third (and arguably most scrutinized)
question in the superficial intro game. Where are you from? What do you
do? Where do you work out? Choose wisely, young Padawan.
about me ... I do yoga in the morning, hike Runyon Canyon with my dog in
the afternoon, attend Barry’s Bootcamp when I’m shooting, have a 24 Hour
Fitness membership left over from when I first moved here (that I only
use when I need a swim), have a current Gold’s membership that I use
when I want to lift hard, take spinning classes at Equinox and Crunch
when my friends are instructing (guest passes rock!), and run on the
sidewalks of Sunset Boulevard when I need a solo sweat. Good luck trying to
define me by my workout.
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