Polyamorous relationships have been around for centuries, yet it’s only now that people are becoming less afraid to speak openly about them. Tortorella and Meyers's relationship is 11 years in the making and survives on what they refer to as a “day by day” pace, knowing that no matter what happens they’re always going to be in each other’s life. As Tortorella explains, this type of trust needs to be sealed before exploring such nonconventional avenues. It doesn’t happen at the beginning: “It’s not like you can jump on Tinder and look for a Nico or Bethany,” he says.
Meyers also admits that due to a lack of examples of similar relationships, she had to teach herself how to navigate the rules. “I think we’re raised with this idea that you’re supposed to go and find ‘the one,’ especially women,” she explains. “You’re looking for your Prince Charming. You need to be proposed to. There’s this one person you’re searching to find, so the idea of finding a stability partner, and having other things on top of that, feels too messy. Then the dating apps make sense because now it’s easier to find ‘the one.’ You can swipe back and forth. You can do a preliminary screening. It’s [like] a business tool.”