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Dancing With the Stars pulled out the big guns for the show's 10th season (and we're not talking about Pamela Anderson's assets) -- there are actual stars. Aside from Pam, Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls, Shannen Doherty, Buzz Aldrin, Kate Gosselin, Reno 911!'s Niecy Nash, and gold-winning Olympic figure skater Evan Lysacek will face off in the reality competition when the season opens March 22 on ABC. Yes, we'll be watching the show -- even though there are zero gay contestants to root for or make fun of. It's time for a Dancing With the Gay Stars that features both the heroes and villains of gay America. With the stage set for instant drama, check out The Advocate's nominations on the following pages. Then tell us who you'd like to see on Dancing With the Stars.
Former Republican Senator Larry Craig
Can he tap his feet to the rhythm?
Glee star Jane Lynch
We really want Sue Sylvester, but we'll happily take Jane.
How I Met Your Mother star Neil Patrick Harris
A good excuse to put him in a tight suit every week.
Republican Oklahoma Rep. Sally Kern
Could we pair her with Maggie Gallagher, or would the heavens open up?
Porn Director Chi Chi LaRue
Would it be more subversive to have a porn-producing drag queen dance with a man or a woman? Either way, it's good TV.
National Organization for Marriage President Maggie Gallagher
She
looks like she could use some fun.
DJ Samantha Ronson
We'd love to see this one put away her pout and her
Marlboros and get jiggy with it.
Westboro Baptist Church founder Fred Phelps
Can he spout homophobic rhetoric like a Tourette's
sufferer while doing the Lindy Hop?
Fitness guru Richard Simmons
What's better on the stage than bedazzled tank tops and Daisy Duke gym shorts?
WNBA player Sheryl Swoopes
The athletes reliably kick ass on this show.
Dirty Sexy Money Actress Candis Cayne
She's a dancer... and she smokin' hot.
Vogue editor-at-large Andre Leon Talley
You know he'll wear utterly ridiculous costumes and consistently insult all the other contestants -- fun!
Actress Betty White
We already know she can dance. See below.
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Charlie Kirk DID say stoning gay people was the 'perfect law' — and these other heinous quotes