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A week of harsh encounters with intolerant Christians leaves our teen diarist disappointed, worried, and yet confident: If true Christianity is defined by love, then he remains a good Christian, whatever others might say.

Satre is a junior at Notre Dame Academy, a private Catholic high school in Middleburg, Va., and the founder of the Virginia LGBT activist group Equality Fauquier-Culpeper. He writes weekly journal entries for Advocate.com.

I have no intention of heading down a path of complaints and meaningless ranting--however, broad observations cannot go unnoticed. Over the past week I have persistently witnessed the abomination of what was once a truly beautifully represented religion.

Christianity seems to be a religion that is meant to love all creation regardless of our views and differences. Of course, we have all seen the corruption and deterrence of organized religions, but how does one actually express hate and make judgment while doing so in the name of Christianity?

Last week I received numerous e-mails full of hatred and containing a consistent message: Every letter stated boldly that the sender's view, as a Christian, required them to stand up against my actions and attempt to educate me about my "perverse lifestyle." One letter stated that I needed to read the Bible and "get right with God," that they "don't hate [me]" but "don't want [me] to end up in hell, which is where [I am] headed if [I] don't get right" while also suggesting that I "should go to church."

Needless to say, this is the most generous letter of them all.

Last week I witnessed the sheer destruction of what once stood as a strong organization in the name of Christian faith, accepting and celebrating diversity and not discriminating on the basis of any difference of belief or self. Christians have pushed out those they believe are "bad eggs" simply because the individuals have diverged from what they believe is the proper conservative Christian way to live.

This specific Christian organization [which I cannot name] has fallen victim to capitalism and power-hungry money mongers who have spread fear and a feeling of complete isolation towards anyone they have the slightest disagreement with. I have been placed in a lose-lose situation in the hands of an organization that feels I am a perfect reflection of sinful abomination--all in the name of Christianity.

I have seen--more often than not--the tenets of Christianity displayed selectively. I have seen--more often than not--Christianity isolating the Wiccan religion simply because of petty differences. I have seen--more often than not--Christians as a people whose sole purpose and mission in life is to "help" people be unaccepting of themselves, give up their own truths, and trade them in for a fake life.

I thought I was what a Christian was supposed to be--as loving as possible, accepting all forms of life without question, and ensuring I protect family values in correlation with nature, life, and love.

Christianity seems to have been redefined by the 20th century, as opposed to how it has been changing over the past centuries. These few people have not represented the entire community of the Christian faith but have dominated my encounters with other "Christians."

Unfortunately, alongside the many I have seen who will only love in the name of Christianity, I feel like I am in the minority--the Christian minority.

I feel confident to express everything I am and everything I believe, and I will always say that I am what I believe a Christian should be. But nearly every single letter and act toward me in the name of Christianity or by a Christian person has been hateful, isolating, and completely focused on my "self-destructive actions."

I am not asking for an explanation; I am asking for a reason: Why have I not received a single letter from anyone saying they accept me because they are a Christian?

30 Years of Out100Out / Advocate Magazine - Jonathan Groff & Wayne Brady

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