Please, Take the X Out of Xmas
BY Christopher Harrity
December 23 2013 4:30 AM ET
Last year we begged you godless "Happy Holidays" types to please refrain from making the big guy's birthday a season of strumpets. Remember, St. Nicholas is a fourth-century saint, not a spray-tanned go-go boy. Must we show you more examples of how not to behave on the holidays? All right, then, if we must. This year we think videos will make better instructional aids.
'Show Your Joe' Kmart Commercial
The most popular example this year forces one to picture the genitals of muscular young men swinging in loose fitting foundation garments. Bells on bobtails ring — in hell!