15 Things You Didn’t Know About Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Marriage

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As one of the few A-list actors to be out and proud, Neil Patrick Harris is a rare role model for LGBT youth, while his actor-chef husband David Burtka is indeed his "better half," according to NPH. Together, the two juggle demanding careers — NPH hosts the Oscars on February 22 — as well as raise a family. As the Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward of the gay world, NPH and David have an oft-told love story. But you don't know everything:

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1. NPH fell for David first.
"I initially fell for David harder than he fell for me," NPH told Out in 2012. "I was in love with him before he was comfortable saying it, and I think that speaks to our past experiences. I remember saying, ‘I think I love you,’ and he was like, ‘That’s really nice,’ which is not necessarily what you want to hear. But I appreciated his honesty in not jumping the gun and saying something because he felt obliged to.”

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2. David was the first one to propose eight years ago.
Neil said yes. “David first proposed to me five years ago on the actual street corner where we met,” Neil said in Out. “We were on our way to an event at an Indian casino 45 minutes out of town in a limousine, and David wanted to stop for some reason that I didn’t quite get. I thought he wanted to get some booze or something. And then he got on one knee and proposed, and I was so freaked out by it that I said, ‘Yes,’ but I didn’t know what it meant.”

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3. But Neil also popped the question to David the following year — though he was wearing his engagement ring from David the whole time.
"Then I got the ring and loved it, and a year later, on Valentine’s Day, I proposed to him in Santa Monica," Neil said in Out. "That was four years ago. The callus on my right hand is long-formed — and not from masturbation. I’m dying to move over to the other hand. I’d also like to call him my husband... I’ve been saying ‘better half’ for as long as I’ve been able to."

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4. Neil and David were married September 16, 2014, in Perugia, Italy, after more than 10 years together.

5. David and Neil wore custom-made tuxes by Tom Ford.

6. The two share the same stats.
"The same shoe size, body size, height, and weight," NPH revealed in Out. "We share a wardrobe." 

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7. Sir Elton John performed at their wedding.
"He and [husband] David [Furnish] and their kids were coming as guests," Neil said at the time, "and there was a piano player that was playing anyways, so I said, 'Would you want to just go up and play one song at some time?' And he said, 'Sure.'"

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8. The married couple’s first dance was to the song “A Moment Like This,” by Kelly Clarkson.
“Our first dance was Kelly Clarkson’s ‘A Moment Like This.’ We loved American Idol season 1, we were Team Kelly. That was always kind of our song. We started dancing to it and we had a plan that … when the song crescendoed — ‘Some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this!’ — fireworks are supposed to go off. … Sure enough, it happened perfectly,” Neil recalled in Out.

9. Neil doesn’t believe in open relationships.
“That’s part of being in a relationship … going through phases of things being great and things being not great. I don’t know that if you’re gay you get this card that says when things aren’t going great you can go fuck other guys. That doesn’t make any sense to me,” Neil shared on Howard Stern’s radio show in 2008.

10. Neil and David are most likely versatile in bed.
The actor also revealed to Howard Stern, “I’m versatile. The best thing about being in a guy-guy relationship is sometimes you feel like being tough, sometimes you feel like being subordinate.”

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11. The two have 4-year-old fraternal twins, Gideon Scott and Harper Grace, they conceived with a surrogate.
“We named Gideon after an artist we collect, Gideon Rubin, and Harper after Harper Lee. To Kill a Mockingbird is one of our favorite books,” David told Out.

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12. The twins call David “Daddy” and Neil “Papa,” they said on an episode of Oprah's Next Chapter.

13. David is the more maternal of the two.
“I didn’t love the first six to nine months," Neil said on the Oprah show. "I struggled with it a lot."


14. David prepares fancy dishes for the kids, like curried carrots and eggs with ricotta cheese. 
“We read a book that said kids could eat spices at an earlier age than most people thought,” David told Oprah. He studied at Le Cordon Bleu and has worked as a private chef.

15. The couple relocated in 2014 from Hollywood to Harlem, where they purchased and renovated a townhouse.
Burtka said he “had a feeling” when he first saw the property. 

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