Advice: How to Fight With a Cookie Monster

BY Steven Petrow

February 27 2012 5:00 AM ET

Question: I’ve been reading that the Girl
Scouts are taking some big heat from “severe” conservatives like Bob Morris,
the Indiana representative, who claims the group is a "radicalized
organization" that "sexualizes" young girls and promotes
homosexuality. It really got my goat when Morris wrote in an open letter: “Many
parents are abandoning the Girl Scouts because they promote homosexual
lifestyles,” then further derided the organization because it accepts
transgender young people. These ridiculous allegations anger me and I’d like to
do something. But what?

Answer: Buy more cookies.

As
soon as I heard these off-the-wall charges that the Girl Scouts “are a tactical
arm of Planned Parenthood” with First Lady Michelle Obama as their
sergeant-in-arms, I went right out to stock up on Thin Mints, Samoas, and
Do-si-dos. This nonsense all started last year when the Girl Scouts of Colorado
and the national leadership accepted a 7-year-old who had been assigned male at
birth but who had long identified as a girl. Some Girl Scouts and their parents
responded to this courageous decision by disbanding
local troops and organizing cookie boycotts – so the best-mannered response is
to get out there and buy your faves!

Outside
my local Harris Teeter, I explained to the young girls and their troop leader
how proud I am of the Girl Scouts leadership for doing the right thing. There
was no need to remind them of their own law, which every Girl Scout pledges to follow:

“I
will do my best to be honest and fair, friendly and helpful, considerate
and caring, courageous and strong, and responsible for what I say and do, and
to respect myself and others, respect authority, use resources wisely,
make the world a better place, and
be a sister to every Girl Scout.”

What
could be a better example of all these noble goals than accepting a child who
agrees to abide by that same code? A 7-year-old who, by all accounts, is a good
kid who just wanted to be a Girl Scout, honest and fair? The vitriol that
ensued was not the slightest bit friendly or helpful, considerate or caring.

On Thursday, Morris made a classic “non-apology”
apology, saying his original words were “emotional, reactionary, and
inflammatory.” Then he proceeded to once again make the same allegations,
insisting: “I still would not sign
the Resolution honoring the Girl Scouts….”

So,
if you're in the mood, why not send some Girl Scout “Shout Out” cookies to Rep.
Morris himself? Borrow a page from Equality NC, which two years ago delivered
hundreds of boxes of Fruit Loops cereal after state representative Larry Brown
referred to gays as “queers” and “fruit loops.” After all, the message on the Shout Out is a bold call to
treat everyone with respect, consideration, and caring – something he clearly
needs to learn a thing or two about.

As
satisfying as it is to fight fire with cookies, there’s more we can (and must) do
to further the mission of the well-mannered. At its core, manners are about
respect for others, and we big boys and girls need to lead by example. To
counter the message being spewed by Rep. Morris and others like him, I suggest
you take this opportunity to spread an alternate message about kids and teens
who don’t align neatly with our expectations of gender behavior. Imagine how
painful it is for those children to listen in on a national conversation based
on vilifying them. Some of those
children might be your own – your daughters and nieces, sons and nephews – who
really need to hear that they’re perfectly fine just the way they are.

If
you’re not comfortable talking about gender identity, you may want to download this
brochure about gender variance in children. Once you realize just how
unremarkable it is for kids to express a gender identity other than what their
body shows, you’ll probably find it easier to talk about it. Sure, you’ll want
to make your message age appropriate, but don’t shy away from the discussion
even if (especially if) it makes you uncomfortable.

OK,
we’ve taken care of the teachable moment. Next up: leveraging social media to
take the message public. Borrow a page from the recent Ellen vs. One Million
Moms smack down by jumping on your Facebook account and “liking” the page
called “Support Trans
Inclusivity; Buy Girl Scout Cookies.” Let everyone on your friend list know
that you’re buying up cookies like nobody’s business.

While
you’re at it, why not get to know the opposition? Visit (and post a message on)
the “Make
the Girl Scouts Clean Again” page, whose mission is “to
separate the Girl Scouts from radical feminism in general and Planned
Parenthood in particular.” Or do the same on the “American
Heritage Girls” page, a Christian Scouting organization
founded in 1995 by parents “who were unhappy that the Girl Scouts accepted
lesbians as troop leaders.” Hold the vitriol and focus on the important message
– respect, consideration, and caring. Just as the Girl Scout law says.