We need less panic from queer media

Recently, my wife and I were making the 2-hour flight to Colombia to stock up on Vitamin E (estrogen), and I found myself panicking over Florida's new anti-trans bathroom ban.

As my wife pointed out, I rarely have a problem in public restrooms at the airport, even though there is always a line. But on July 1, 2023, the Sunshine State put a target on my back, restricting transgender people from using government-owned facilities that aligned with their gender. The airport does have gender-neutral bathrooms. I know their locations, but the staff doesn't always unlock them.

Fortunately, at age 72, I hardly ever need to use the bathroom, only about as often as I breathe. Or blink. But I was a worried on this trip. My wife assured me I was exaggerating the problem. I assured her she was not transgender; when she peed, she did not need to worry about security paged to her stall. But here's the thing: She was right. I was worrying for nothing. I'd absorbed the broad outlines of the crappy law but not the specific details.

The ACLU has awonderful primer on Florida's law that describes these details in...detail. The law says that if I use the bathroom that's a) in a government facility, b) and I’m asked to leave c) by a government employee, and d) I refuse to do so, THEN and only then may I be charged with criminal trespass. I make sure I'm in and out so fast that a government employee would have to be The Flash to catch me in the act, and even then, I'd just leave.

My bigger point here is that there is understandably a LOT of panic right now in the trans community. But sometimes, it's because we don't have enough nuance or context. And I think we are going to need those more than ever.

For instance, I've read up on the trans coverage of the NDAA, the defense reauthorization bill that far-right Republicans used to ban coverage of gender-affirming care for the children of service members. The coverage is understandably uniformly outraged, angry, and loudly condemning.

This is totally justified, but it is also not half enough.

To understand Republicans, you have to read everything they do and say in reverse.

They always take everything they can get and, at times, don't reveal where they believe public support is not currently on their side. I'm hardly a legislative expert, and the NDAA reauthorization is just one example. And to be clear, this is only the first drop on the much larger meter. Republicans are pushing further and further out in their attack on trans people, and none of us knows yet where they will stop.

With that said, here's one take on what they haven't done (yet):

• Ban adult trans servicemembers' hormone therapy, which isstill covered (surgery is not).
• Provide affirming care grounds for removal from their home by the local Department of Child Services, as states like Texas did.

Despite scores of trial balloons floated by Republicans since 2019 to move the legal age of care in red states to 25 or even 29, NDAA tops out at age 18 even though servicemembers' childrenare covered until age 21 (to age 23 if they're in college).

Before I get hate mail, let me add that about900-1599 kids seek hormones or blockers yearly through TRICARE, the servicemembers health plan. Every single one who can't get treatment is a tragedy, and I'm not here to imply differently.

But I want us to remain grounded by the scale of the harm being done by different legislation. We must understand what each measure contains and what it will do to us.

I am also susceptible to the fact that I am writing this from the (somewhat) safe vantage point of an educated adult white person (although in a state that is trying to cut off my hormones after 50 years). In addition, almost all such measures disproportionately impact those who are low-income, of color, and/or young.

But when you're in the fight of your life, it's vital to know precisely what fight you're in.

And right now, our gay and trans press–wonderful as they are–are better at giving us outrage and panic click-bait than stats, graphics, in-depth analysis, and context. We have the knowledge and perspective to understand what we're fighting, who will be hurt, and how.

Performative cruelty is the beating heart of MAGA-vile, so there's going to be a lot of it coming at us.

They will push 500 bills they never try to enact just to enjoy our pain and outrage. They'll actually try to enact 50 things that never get into law. They'll enact 50 things that are instantly stayed by the courts or—like Florida's bathroom bill and its Don't Say Gay law (mostly gutted by the courts)—are much less than they appear on closer inspection.

And yes, some truly horrific things will get into law and policy. We know that. But if everything is equally horrible and outrageous, then we're not getting informed; we're just getting panicked, just like I was about my trips to the bathrooms at Miami Dade Airport.

Trans news media and trans influencers are still very new, but not so new that those of us doing it can't step up our game a notch for what's coming at us all.