Every week, The Advocate's Jami Smith brings you the top 10 tweets from LGBT comedians — and our favorite gay jokes from straight comedians, or just whatever made us laugh. Follow @gaysayer on Twitter now if you want daily updates.
And now a post from your host:
Don't have any plans for new year's probs just gonna have a quiet night in texting my exes "I can still taste your lips :'( <33" as usual
— Zackary what? (@Zackblows) December 28, 2011
Today, Marcus Bachmann reaffirmed his belief that marriage is a sacred institution reserved for one closeted gay man and one crazy bitch.
— Nick Stadler (@NickadooLA) December 16, 2011
Best part about being transgender is using my powers to turn people retroactively gay. THAT'S RIGHT, HIGH SCHOOL GIRLFRIEND. YOU A DYKE NOW.
— Avery Edison (@aedison) December 20, 2011
Small difference between a lady and a woman. HUGE difference between a cat lady and a Catwoman.
— Megan Amram (@meganamram) December 18, 2011
I've decided to start calling hangovers "wine flu", it's much more dignified.
— lola jane reid (@candyforbfast) December 21, 2011
When people say, "Jesus take the wheel." Tell them "Not baby Jesus, he's a TERRIBLE driver."
— kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) December 23, 2011
"This is where the magic happens." - Harry Potter walking into his bedroom and every other room on MTV Cribs.
— braden graeber (@hipstermermaid) December 23, 2011
Just opened a bottle of wine and threw the cork in the garbage. That's called "confidence".
— rachel lichtman (@DJRotaryRachel) December 31, 2011
Number 1, Best Tweet Ever:
"Spread it open as wide as you can. Okay now hold still." - Georgia O'Keeffe
— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) December 30, 2011