Best Tweet Ever: Breaking Bieber News Has Us Distracted

This week, we rejoice in the reelection of our president, we honor our veteran troops, but most importantly, we mourn America’s most tragic loss — the break up of Justin Beiber and Selena Gomez.  Here are our favorite Twitter jokes of the week.

For even more laughs, join the legion of more than 7,000 jokesters who follow @gaysayer. New jokes are posted every day.

And now a post from your Twitter host:

Almost went to the gym before I remembered that lesbians don't give a shit and got a cat instead.

— Jami Smith (@jamismithcomic) November 9, 2012

Number 10:

BREAKING: Taco Bell's are popping up everywhere in Colorado

— The Fake CNN (@TheFakeCNN) November 8, 2012

Number 9:

Just once I want John Corbett to slip in a "YOU BROKE MY HEART!" into an Applebee's ad

— Sara Schaefer (@saraschaefer1) November 9, 2012

Number 8:

I walked by an empty chair and hugged President Obama.

— Solomon Georgio (@solomongeorgio) November 8, 2012

Number 7:

Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez broke up. I bet Selena pulls an Anne Heche and goes back to dating guys.

— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) November 10, 2012