"Don't talk to him, don't even look at
him," a stocky, bearded gentleman tugging at
the arm of a curious 3-year-old said softly to our group of
five while waiting in line to ride Alice in Wonderland.
"You guys are an abomination."
The two groups
flung arguments back and forth: "Judge not lest ye be
judged," followed by talk of "securing a place
in the kingdom of heaven." Suddenly a woman,
visiting the park with her daughter, interjected,
asking the gentleman to move along, making clear she was
appalled by his hateful rhetoric.
And thus paints
the picture of another Gay Days at Disneyland, the
11th annual gathering of gays, lesbians, and
their supporters from all over the United States, descending
on Anaheim for the two-day event. Dressed in
gay-identified bright red T-shirts and mixing among
the already diverse Disneyland crowd, cultures collided and
ideas converged in what is arguably one of the best
opportunities all year to show mainstream Americans
what this equal-rights hubbub is all about.
The event, while
not officially sanctioned by Disney -- Gay Days started
after a Disney-hosted gay night was canceled in 1998 --
nevertheless attracted some 25,000 participants in
2007. It's even the subject of a book -- Gay
Days aficionados Jeffrey Epstein and Eddie Shapiro immersed
themselves in Disney culture to pen Queens in the
Kingdom in 2007.
Though Gay Days
certainly paints an image of a united gay community --
particularly given the upcoming election, Obama-Biden and
"No on Prop. 8" stickers were nearly as prevalent as
the red T-shirts they adorned -- the event
has always met with a fair amount of criticism.
This year Disney
meal ticket Hannah Montana -- a.k.a. Miley Cyrus --
kicked the gays and other guests to the curb for her
16th birthday party on Sunday, forcing the park
to shut down a full five hours early. But that was a minor
inconvenience compared to the slew of park patrons who
just happened to book their trips on the same weekend
as Gay Days -- some of them none too happy about the
coincidence.
There are the
straight men and women, unaffiliated with Gay Days, who
appeared to be rethinking the red Mickey T-shirts they
slipped into that morning, now finding
themselves dressed in the same color as half the
park's patrons, most of whom were walking arm in arm with
someone of the same sex. Then there was the Mark Twain
riverboat singles cruise that a few dozen straight
folks seemed to unassumingly stumble onto, plus the
Downtown Disney bars spilling over with the West Hollywood
contingent. Yes, Disneyland definitely has a different
vibe during Gay Days.
And there are
moments when that vibe has the potential to do great
things. A happy gay couple who had just tied the knot
celebrated at a restaurant at California Adventure, a
carnival-themed park affiliated with Disneyland.
The half dozen straight couples who looked on wished
them well, a few stopping by to ask questions about
California's Proposition 8, which, if passed,
would make same-sex marriage illegal in the state.
They took photos, ate cake, people dining at nearby tables
toasted them, and a woman even congratulated the flower
girl, the 6-year-old the couple had adopted together.
Those who took
issue with the onslaught of gay park visitors seemed
relatively few and quiet about it -- for the time being.
A few hours later
at the same restaurant, the bulk of the clientele had
moved to the rooftop bar, now one big red shirt as far as
the eye could see. A few scattered families remained,
caught in the awkward transition from lunch to happy
hour. For the most part, everyone got on famously. But
one particularly riled up group of men, parked on the same
string of barstools for the bulk of the afternoon, had
reached new levels of intoxication. Hugging had turned
into making out, the subtle pat on the butt was now a
full-on hand down the pants, and, for a sly photo op,
friends cheered as one flopped his penis out of his pants.
The group was
quickly chastised. Other red shirts there to celebrate,
appalled by this group's behavior, chased them out of
the bar before kids and their parents figured out what
was going on.
But the damage
had been done. And it's just one example of wildly
inappropriate behavior that took place across both parks
during Gay Days weekend.
And herein lies
the question:
Is Gay Days a
chance for gays and lesbians to show mainstream
Americans just how important it is that they support equal
rights, or is it just another chance to indulge
in stereotypical behavior?
Is the woman who,
an hour after the restaurant incident, demanded a
refund from guest services because "some things are
just not OK for my kids to see," responding
negatively to the gay lifestyle or to adults
exposing themselves in public?
For the families
who frequent Disneyland, seeing a well-adjusted gay
couple with two kids wearing "No on 8"
stickers strike up a friendly conversation with an
elderly couple sporting McCain-Palin buttons is a sign
of what good can come from cultures colliding. But seeing a
50-something guy holding a leash connected to a barely legal
twink, their tank tops announcing them as
"daddy" and "boy," leads to a
different conversation entirely.
Lisa and Beth,
who married in Vancouver, Canada, last year, have
been to the last three Gay Days at Disneyland. They live in
southern Utah and say they're far more
comfortable holding hands and acting like a
"real couple" here than they are at home.
"Strength in numbers," they said.
At the same time
they feel like "ambassadors" for the gay
community -- "especially now, this is our
chance to show everyone else we're really no
different," Beth says.
People like the
man who views gays as an abomination and the woman who
wanted her tickets refunded -- not to mention the random
sprinkling of guys who "take things way too
far" -- had the opposite effect on Billy, a
first-timer. He said he's "not as
comfortable" at Gay Days as he thought
he'd be, and the families who have a problem with the
gay community are "only part of the
problem."
Last year, when
Bill O'Reilly went on a tirade about Gay Days,
calling the grouping of gay people with families
"insane" and "inappropriate"
before showing footage of some of that inappropriate
behavior on rides, gays and lesbians were up in
arms. It's just a select few, we countered. The
bulk of the crowd was just there to have a good time and
it's not fair to judge entire groups by the bad
behavior of a few.
And it's
true -- bad eggs are bad eggs, whether they're gay or
straight.
But this year was
different. There's too much at stake. In an election
year when, particularly, Prop. 8 is likely to be close
and we'll need every "no" vote we can get, we had the
opportunity to show straight families we're no
different than they are -- to possibly make them think
twice about their stance on certain issues as we approach
Election Day.
The opportunity
was there, and I'm sure some folks left Disneyland
with a newfound respect for our lives and our
families.
But as another
woman who approached guest services to demand her refund
put it, "I had no idea some people could be so
filthy. I'm appalled."
And I'm
afraid that's the overarching image a few too many
families took home after visiting the Magic
Kingdom during Gay Days weekend.
