Last week, an event occurred which shattered the core of the LGBT community to its foundations, its impact was felt far and wide, and the consequences changed the queer world irrevocably. Partner turned against partner, the White Party suddenly turned grey, and drag shows became a huge drag. Only one thing could have caused such chaos and destruction, laid our community so low, and shattered our way of life so completely. From my couch, I felt a great disturbance in the scene, as if millions of voices lisped out in horror.
The Human Rights Campaign endorsed Hillary Rodham Clinton.
The horror! The ignominy! The... no big deal. I know, Friends of Bernie, it's an absolutely terrible thing; he's been such a huge advocate of LGBT rights for years (even though he really hasn't), and I know you Hillary Clinton fans feel totally justified in your righteousness (even though you shouldn't), in your victory. But wow did we tear into each other over this. I don't even know who is right in their righteousness.
First there were the "THE HRC IS JUST FOR RICH WHITE GAY MEN!" cries and how the organization doesn't represent you. So that makes me ask; why do you even care that the HRC endorsed HRC? I mean, if an organization that doesn't represent me endorses someone, what does it matter? I really don't care who the United Snake Wranglers and Alligator Wrestlers Union endorses, as they don't represent me; mostly because I quit paying dues six months ago. So what if the HRC endorses Hillary? It's not like they were going to endorse anyone on the Republican side, aside from maybe John Kasich. Okay, not really. But the HRC is just one of dozens of LGBT organizations out there, and it doesn't represent the whole of us -- but as I've said time and again, no one does.
Real talk here: both Hillary and Bernie both have less than perfect records when it comes to LGBT rights. Bernie only opposed DOMA because of a States' Rights defense, and Hillary has had the same attitude until lately, but so has President Obama, and boy didn't we all want them for our local Pride parade grand marshalls this summer? Bernie is a politician and so is Hillary; if you think Bernie isn't going to flip-flop and obfuscate on issues, you're living in a dream world. Yeah, Hillary has a reputation as the kind of person who takes a poll on whether she should wear the blue or the gray socks with her pantsuit. So freaking what?
Let me give you a thought experiment. Let's say you're surrounded by a bunch of thugs and bullies. They're holding you down, beating the crap out of you, calling you names, and stealing your things. Along comes a person who says they want to help and support you in your fight back. Are you going to ask them why they're willing to get into the fight with you? Only someone so caught up in their own social justice ego would get upset about why someone would support LGBT rights. It would be nice to have had them always been an ally, and it might be a bit expedient on their parts to go with the popular tide, but so what? If they turned their backs on us if the popular opinion turned, no one would trust them because of the instant sell out credits they would earn. These folks have hitched their cart to our horse and they're riding this thing all the way to Southern Decadence.
Finally, in the end, we all know that the Democrats are the ones who are going to keep passing and supporting LGBT rights. It doesn't matter if we give them endorsements or we invite them to speak at fundraisers, it doesn't matter if they give us lip service in the debates, it's who they are. We're fighting over who we think likes us the most. The closest I can compare it to is to being some rotten little kid playing mommy and daddy off each other during a divorce to see what we can get out of them.
We're acting like emotionally-crippled teenagers exploiting a situation between two people who were going to do the right thing anyway. We don't owe either candidate anything, and they certainly shouldn't think they're entitled to our vote. Furthermore, we shouldn't be tearing into each other and saying we don't know what's at stake here. I can't think of any LGBT person who isn't "woke" to that fact. Support Bernie for his aggressive anti-Wall Street plans or support Hillary for her pragmatic politics, but really, let's be real. Come November 6, you're going to be voting for the Democrat anyway. Right?
AMANDA KERRI is an Oklahoma City-based comedian and a board member for OKC Pride. Follow her on Twitter @EternalKerri.