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"We will get through this false story line based on lies, hate, and power — and the queer community will still be there, and in all likelihood, even stronger," a mental health expert tells The Advocate.
(Editor's note: This article was published after the 2024 election. However, these tips are relevant as Trump goes back into office.)
It's going to get worse before it gets better — but we've been there before.
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With the results of the 2024 presidential election confirmed, members of the LGBTQ+ community are understandably distressed. Seeing as Donald Trump plans to rollback transgender rights and other protections for queer people, it's clear why 86 percent of LGBTQ+ voters cast their ballots for Kamala Harris, and why 62 percent said they’d be “scared” for Trump to win.
Many are also alarmed that the hateful policies are seemingly what the majority of Americans have endorsed, but Dr. Michelle Forcier, a clinician with LGBTQ+ digital healthcare platform FOLX Health, believes it better to interpret the results in a different way.
"Remember too that despite, yes, Trump won, he really does not represent, in any way, shape or form, a very large number of U.S. citizens," Forcier tells The Advocate. "We know that unfortunately, many people voted on a single issue, say immigration, the economy, inflation. Many persons decided to vote for someone who represents themselves as a business man, not a politician."
"While many of these persons may buy into his words and action regarding racism, sexism, ableism, and trans and homophobia, many persons actually do not. They voted on a single issue, and our community is again collateral. Remember his win represents a very skewed and myopic focus for many — but not all — of the voting public. And we can learn from this win and our community can come back stronger."
There's room for despair, Forcier says, but there are ways to help get rid of it, too. Here are some of her tips on how to move forward.
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One of the most important things to do over the next four years is to "take each moment one moment at a time" and "take each day one day at a time," Forcier says. Focus on the little things around you that bring you joy: your family, friends, pets, favorite shows, hobbies — whatever it may be.
"We make space to grieve, and then work through our grief. We make room for hope, since that will help us envision how we move forward," Forcier says. "We make room for confidence in our strength and abilities, and commitment to a future that is centered on equity and justice."
Because "we are here" and "we are not going anywhere," Forcier says "we all need to plan for the long game. And the long game means we need to be whole, healthy, and centered in our best and most authentic selves."
This means eating healthy, exercising, and sleeping well. It also includes maintaining your social circle and making new connections in your community — not self-isolating.
"We can get good sleep. We can exercise and make sure our nutrition is supporting our bodies and hearts. We connect and reach out to support, get supported, and create support for family, friends, and community," Forcier continues. "We stay committed to our idea of what is right and just. We are not going anywhere."
For some, it may be cathartic to speak with others online or consume political content. For others, it could make the situation even more distressing. It's not wrong to want to distract yourself at this moment.
"It is ok to not be all over the internet right now," Forcier emphasizes. "Ask yourself — what am I looking for? Is the web creating good feelings of support or anxiety? And finally, ask yourself if you might turn off the computer or phone, and focus on the life and friends and family right there with you."
You may be able to find comfort in the people around you, or even just the knowledge that many others are feeling like you are right now. Forcier says to "tap into people and communities that make you feel safe and supported."
"If those communities are online, your faith based community, a sports or activity group ... whatever, whoever is safe and caring is who we need to be with right now," she says.
There will be calls to action, to mobilize, and to organize in the days ahead. It is not wrong for you to not be feeling up to it now. While using the means you have to fight back can help you to feel empowered, and you should not linger in despair, you do not have to do everything today.
"We don't need to expose ourselves to false news, false narratives, and the hate that is out there. We can take that step back and say, for now, I need time and space to regroup," Forcier says. "There will be time where many of us will reassess, venture forth and in direct and indirect ways, start taking on the people and systems that oppress us — but that does not have to be today or right now."
Hope is not a feeling that comes and goes — it is an ideal you must keep building day after day. As Forcier notes: "This is another 4 year political cycle. We can take from the experience and we can make of the experience what we will of it."
"Will this be a chance to really explore racism, sexism, trans and homophobia in a meaningful way?" she asks. "Will we have opportunity to work harder, more explicitly to call discrimination and hate what it is? Will we not let them subjugate us, not let them squash our spirit — but raise our voices and our hearts so that love conquers hate?"
"I believe that love and compassion is stronger than ignorance, hate, and bias. I believe we have our work cut out for us, and while I wish we did not, it is what it is," Forcier continues. "We are strong, smart, capable, and if nothing else, resilient. We will get through this false story line based on lies, hate, and power — and the queer community will still be there, and in all likelihood, even stronger."
